Issue #2 Submissions

Once more. Here we are.
Issue #1 is rising in the oven as we speak. Thanks again to everyone who has contributed. Things are really looking delightful. Specific details as to where and how to pick up a copy will be forthcoming at the speed of progress. Not long now.

The time has come, though, for thoughts to turn to Issue #2. We want your stories and your stuff. Without you, Wufniks is just a fancy font and a saggy blog.

What we absolutely want:

1) Short stories. Up to 2,500 words. About anything. Can be your latest gems or old neglected .doc files sitting in Your Documents. As long as you want someone to read it, we want it.

2) Writer’s challenge. This month’s challenge has been set by Geoff Ryman. He’s won more awards than you and I have hands, and is the author of the groundbreaking novel, 253.

Stories for this section should be:

  • set in the future
  • written in the future tense
  • written in the second-person

Read the full challenge here! (including an example from Geoff)

3) Miscellany. This issue we’d like you to try to give us something that looks like this:

  • Write a Personal ad that would tickle your boniest bone. Keep it short.
    eg. High-ranking Koopa Troopa WLTM same for fun and walking back-and-forth from pipe to pipe. Must live in Level 3 and like Tom Jones. Box 404.
  • Write a biography of a fictional character. It must be exactly 100 words long.
    For example, you could choose Mr. Miyagi, the Jack of Spades, the blond guy from Double Dragon, the trombonist from the Lurpak adverts, or anyone else we might have heard of. (Even if we haven’t we can look them up.)

Of course, anything you send us will be received with salivating mouths. So don’t be put off if none of these tickle your proverbial gherkin.

email submissions to:
deadline: 29th February 2008

Once again, we can’t pay you. We’re sorry. We’re cold. We’re running low on Oxo cubes as it is. We hear they have army shirts where you can boil the buttons to make broth. Maybe we could get one of those.

As per ever, we’re looking forward to reading your submissions,
Have some fun writing them.

All the Wufniks,
Love from,


6 thoughts on “Issue #2 Submissions

  1. “Show me a man who lives alone and has a perpetually clean kitchen, and eight times out of nine I’ll show you a man with detestable spiritual qualities.”

    O, That Charles Bukowski!

    Issue #1 looks good guys. I particularly like Zubair Mayat’s piece. That guy is a good guy!

    Frank E. Towers, MD

  2. What a bunch of blokes you guys are. You’ve mixed the ancient Swedish art of Haiku and mixed it with the American tradition of building tall things out of contempt for God. You should be commisioned to write funny sayings on socks. I’ve always wanted to see things written on my socks when I take my shoes off after a hard day.
    Great job wufniks!”

  3. Heard (i typed ‘heart’ and, yes, I do heart this magazine) about this magazine from a friend of mine. I agree with this guy Eric (Hi, Eric!) about you writing funny things on socks, though I have a further suggestion: you should have the joke on one foot and the punchline on the other. That way people wouldn’t be able to wear odd socks because the joke wouldn’t make sense any more. It really bugs me when people wear odd socks.

    Keep ’em comin’ guys

    Nic x

  4. nicola is correct: the joke is finally on the other foot. (the punchline has turned the other cheek. and placed its tongue firmly in the original cheek, to avoid damage, which can be agony. like biting the inside of your mouth just before a job interview. or hooking your spleen on a poorly-tidied coathanger.)


  5. FAO: Frank Towers

    Did you know Charles Bukowski’s grave has “Don’t Try” written on it? I don’t think he had the right sort of attitude for Wufniks magazine.

  6. Pingback: Again With The Updates « Wufniks

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